The Downside of Bluffing (a.k.a. Lying)
Linda L. Barkacs & Craig B. Barkacs
Most people have been tempted to bluff at some time during negotiations. Perhaps they are looking to buy a new car and they tell the salesperson they were offered a better price at another car dealership, but it’s not true (i.e., it’s a lie). Or they are interviewing for a job, and exaggerate the salary offered by a competing company (once again, it’s a lie). What’s the harm, right? Many people believe that lying, euphemistically called “bluffing,” is an acceptable negotiation tactic. But is it?
Before launching into the discussion of whether bluffing is right or wrong, let’s clarify what we are not talking about. There are obviously various cultural circumstances where bluffing at the outset is done regularly and even expected. In those situations, everyone at the negotiation table recognizes and understands what is happening. It is almost a form of ritual. So let’s set those situations aside. Cultural or ritual bantering notwithstanding, there comes a point in every negotiation where serious negotiators expect honest discourse.
I teach negotiation to various audiences, including college students. One semester I had a particularly enthusiastic and talented class. About two-thirds of the way through the semester we were doing a complex negotiation. After everyone was finished negotiating, I began to debrief the negotiation. A student in the back of the room raised their hand, and when I called on the student, they looked across the room at another student, pointed directly at a student I’ll call “Avery,” and loudly proclaimed “Avery lied to me!” I admit it was a shock, but I told my students we were about to have a learning moment. After quieting my now-very excited class, I asked the accuser why they thought they had been lied to. The accuser gave a detailed account, and in my own mind, it sounded credible. There are often, however, two sides to the same story. So I asked Avery, the accused, what had happened. The stories matched! At this point, all I could do was ask Avery: “Did you lie?” Avery replied “yes.” The class gasped. I pushed on (did I mention I’m a former trial attorney?) “Why did you lie?” Avery, the now confessed liar, replied: “I had two reasons.” In my own head I remember thinking “wow, Avery thought it out.” I asked Avery to explain.
Me/Professor: Why did you lie?
Avery/Confessed Liar: You told us to try new things in the classroom.
Me/Professor: True. I didn’t think you would include lying in that category. Moving forward, lying is not to be included as “trying new things.” What was the second reason?
Avery/Confessed Liar: In prior negotiations, other students lied to me and got a better deal. I wanted to see if I could do the same.
Me/Professor: Did you get a better deal?
Avery/Confessed Liar: Oh, yeah! [spoken gleefully]
This quite unexpected but provocative dialogue with Avery inspired a robust discussion by the entire class about the downside of lying. Overwhelmingly, the other students were not impressed with Avery’s approach. In fact, they came down pretty hard on the student. At this point, I decided to toss Avery a softball.
Me/Professor: Now that you know how the rest of the students feel about your lying in the negotiation, would you ever do it again?
Avery/Confessed Liar: Yes.
The class reacted with stunned silence, and I knew a learning moment truly was upon us. What was learned, you ask? There are at least six downsides to lying:
Ethics: It’s the principle of the thing – lying to unfairly gain an advantage (or take advantage) is morally wrong.
Strategic Impact: Your lie could turn a deal into a no-deal because the other party believes that there is no bargaining zone, e.g., you present a false “bottom line” that the other party can’t meet, so they walk away from a deal that possibly could have been made.
Legal Exposure: Lying in certain circumstances could subject you to a lawsuit (civil) or prosecution (criminal). If you lie to get a job, in many states this is legal grounds (“cause”) for termination.
Damage to Relationships: Once a lie is revealed, trust is lost with that individual. You lose credibility and effectiveness in dealing with that person.
Damage to Reputation: People you have lied to tell others about your lies. The damage can be far-ranging and long-lasting (potentially forever), especially in the era of social media.
Retaliation: Lying may cause others to retaliate against you. Studies show people are much more likely to lie to you in a negotiation after you have lied to them.
My former student discovered the high price of lying. For the remainder of the semester, no one wanted to negotiate with Avery on their team. No one wanted to negotiate opposite Avery. And Avery never successfully closed another deal during the remainder of the negotiation classes. To me, it was a microcosm of the real world. Was it worth it? I’ll let you decide . . .